The standings are calculated based on teams getting 3 points for a win, 1 point for a tie, and 0 points for a loss.  A forfeit is booked as a 1-0 victory.  Yes, we know that your team would have probably scored at least 200 goals if the game hadn't been a forfeit.  Thank you.

If two teams are tied in the standings, the tie is broken based on head to head results between the two teams.

If more than two teams are tied at any point in the standings, the program is set to break ties in this order of events:

1. Goal differential.  
2. Goals allowed
3. Value of gifts delivered to the office staff.

And yes, we realize that in the really good soccer leagues the appropriate tiebreaker is whatever measurement puts your team ahead.